the underbelly


My oven is trying to drug me
February 5, 2009, 11:10 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I’m pretty sure something’s wrong with my oven. Today I tried to roast a chicken leg with some veggies. I set the oven at 450 degrees and sure enough within a few minutes it got there. How do I know? Because my smoke alarm started to go off. This is a totally normal occurrence for me. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it before, but I live in a remarkably tiny studio apartment. It’s 250 sq feet tops, though possibly smaller. So any hint of smoke causes my alarm to go off. Lucky for my the alarm is polite – it doesn’t like to intrude. It’s “alarm” is only a tad bit louder than a car horn about seven blocks away. This is great for me because it goes off a lot so I’m not deaf as I would be if it were at a normal volume. This is potentially dangerous as I strongly doubt it could wake me up were there a real fire.

So ANYWAY the alarm went off, I put the chicken in the oven and set the timer. A few minutes later I started to feel dizzy. Foggy. Drugged. I had only had a couple of sips of wine and believe you me I am not a light weight, so it wasn’t that…..I didn’t take any hallucinogenic drugs to my knowledge…nor did I roofie myself….it was the oven. I don’t know what that thing is pumping out but I won’t be using it any time soon. Even with the window open (it’s like ten degrees outside, so that was super comfortable) and my face pressed to the screen I still felt woozy. I think I killed about a college week’s worth of brain cells tonight.

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